4 Reasons Why Freelancers Think They Can’t Go on Holiday:
No work 🡆 no income
My clients will hire someone else 🡆 I won’t have work when I come back
Too many worries about work 🡆 I won’t enjoy my holiday
I’ll miss something important 🡆 My skills will be outdated/no longer relevant
5 Reasons Why Freelancers Need a Holiday:
Time off will help you relax 💆
Be more creative 🎨
Regain perspective 🌍
Make better decisions 💭
Learn new skills 🤹
How to Combat Common Freelance Thinking Errors About Holidays
Does this sound familiar? Do you also not allow yourself to go on holiday because you’re self-employed, even though you desperately need some time off? Here are some techniques that I use with my clients as a cognitive behavioural hypnotherapist, which will help you combat your cognitive distortions, also known as thinking errors.
Be Aware of the Negativity Bias
When the spiral of unhelpful thoughts leads you down the path of “this is going to be awful,” start asking yourself one question: Is this true?
Humans tend to remember negative events more clearly than positive experiences. This is called the negativity bias and is thought to have helped us survive. Who cares about the sun shining when a bear is about to eat us? We’ll end up remembering the bear, not the weather, even though it was lovely.
In that scenario, the negativity bias worked to our benefit, but in many other cases, it does not. I am pretty sure you can easily recall examples from the past when you didn’t make much money due to not having clients at that particular moment in time. Yet here you are, able to pay your bills. Because you are a freelancer, you know how to prepare for a rainy day. Why not prepare for a holiday as well?
Use De-Catastrophising Effectively
If the spiral of unhelpful thoughts still leads you down the path of “I won’t be able to cope,” then start asking yourself another question: Then what?
Let’s assume you go on holiday, and your clients hire someone else to do the job that you would have worked on. Well, then what? In the unlikely event that this is true (that all of your clients hire someone else), you might return to find no jobs to work on. Then what?
You’ll come up with a solution, as you always have. You might ask your existing clients if they have any other work for you. You might start looking for new clients – and you will find them, as you have many times before.
Let the Past Be Your Guide
Self-employment is not an easy path. You have no colleagues to blame. Every mistake is yours to own up to. Every problem is yours to resolve. Throughout the years, you have built skills that – let’s face it – many other people lack: resilience, creativity, problem-solving, self-reliance... These things come naturally to you.
Remind yourself of what you have achieved.
Remind yourself of similar situations that you have already overcome.
Remind yourself that you are still standing.
A holiday won’t take those skills away from you. A holiday won’t be an unresolvable crisis.
Stay Positive and Use Stoicism to Do So
In the unlikely event that all those things you feared would happen actually do happen, it’s best to stay positive. They would have happened anyway, regardless of you taking time off. Why? Because change is the only constant in our life. If nothing ever changed, that would be truly awful.
It is important to understand a stoic concept: There are things in this world we can change, and then there are those (the majority) over which we have no influence whatsoever (dichotomy of control). Even those things you can’t change provide you with an opportunity to reassess your current position.
Maybe what happened, happened for a reason. Maybe it brings up concerns and thoughts you weren’t able to listen to while you were busy working. Maybe they are meant to spur you into action, so that you can change things you weren’t happy with in the first place. Use courage, temperament, justice, and wisdom to shape a brighter future for yourself – and if needed, that wisdom could come from a therapist like myself.
Speaking of stoicism, I’ll leave you with a quote by Seneca:
“We are often more frightened than hurt; and we suffer more from imagination than from reality.”
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